So…As some of you might know, playing digital football has become an addiction of mine. As much as I yell at my TV and feel like the worst excuse for a human being who wants to go outside and pour lighter fluid all over his controller and watch it burn in the driveway when I’m losing a game, I keep playing.
I can’t stop, well I can…I think, but I don’t want to. And it’s not an addiction as if I don’t take care of my life or whatever; but when I’m winning, damn I feel good. And if the score is close my heart beats so fast, I feel like I just got done running, which I don’t think I’ve done in the past 20 to 25 years.
So as of March 24th 2017 at 5 o’clock p.m. Central Standard Time I have played 318 online games against other people, I’ve won 180 of those which means that 138 of them resulted in a loss. Which means I won 56.6% of the games that I played against random people.
For the longest time I did not have a rating and I did not understand how someone with a record of 120-140 could be ranked when someone else with a record of 140-120 could not even be ranked. I still don’t understand it.
As you might know, or can make an educated guess at, I play as the Seattle Seahawks and I have for the last 318 games. It’s my team, I don’t care how bad they might be; hell…Matt Hasselbeck could still be our QB and guess what, it won’t change. You could say this player is better than that player, but I don’t really care; is he wearing a Seahawks jersey?
See now…if Marshawn Lynch comes back to the NFL as a Oakland Raider that is…I don’t know man.
Anyhow, I got done playing a game one night and it finally gave me a ranking, it’s got slightly better in the past two days. According to the game I’m ranked 7,053 out of 100,000 players. That feels really good, probably better than it should; not many people are going to be like, “Oh look at that kid.” They are just going to see my gamer tag next to numbers that most likely won’t mean much to them.
And, honestly I don’t feel like I’m…deserving of that many wins when you take into account that if you quit the game, you lose; if they quit the game you win. I have a few wins that are just wins because the other person didn’t even snap the ball and he was forced to forfeit due to excessive grieving, which means they got 3 penalties in a row.
I also have a few loses because my modem decided to take a shit, and if I left the game, which is what happens when you lose internet connection, then you lose.
Then you got to account for the fact that the majority of players do dumb shit that a coach would never do unless he was trying to lose his job. They go for it on 4th&25, they fake a field goal on the 4th down when they are 70 yards away from the goal post. That being said some of those games don’t even feel like a competition.
And then you get those players who do dumb shit, but for some fucking reason get away with it every time. Sometimes I keep playing them and say, “They’ll fuck up sooner or later.” But when they don’t and I’m losing 21 to 0 in the second half, that is when I quit.
But I guess I’m way better than I thought, I’m in the top 7.1% of the top 100,000 players.
So…don’t ask me why the picture says my rank is 0-0; I’ll just make an educated guess and say that the system is slow at updating.