I Know What You’re Thinking

Monowi-Nebraska-One-Person-2I took the words right out of his mouth, and it was pretty comical indeed.

I’d like to think of myself as someone who has a good sense of humor, and like I mentioned a few times before; growing up with a physical disability and learning how to make fun of myself only helped me to spread the laughter among my friends.

Growing up with a disability I’ve learned throughout years upon years followed by a decade that if you’re able to tell people that you have a second penis, or whatever it might be; you remove the power from them. And hey, if you do have a second penis girls, or even guys, might be more curious to look at and/or play with.

But this story is not about a penis, just an odd example I guess you could say.

Anyhow, being able to be proud of who you are; for something that someone else might find odd, is a powerful tool. It removes their power.

There is some other things that contribute to that, but this is not what I’m going to talk about.

Point is, I can make people smile, and to me that is one of the greatest feelings in the world, other than sex.

I have a friend, he lives in Washington State…again. I wrote about him a few times. Hell, if you care to dive into my blog you can learn a lot about him and/or the getting made fun of crap that happened to me when I was a youngster.

After some unfortunate events took place, my best friend Eric moved back to Washington State from Colorado. I knew this kid for a long time, like back in the year of nineteen hundred and ninety-eight.

I moved to Washington State in 1998, and to this day we still talk. He, along with some of my other friends, miss me and wish I never moved to Nebraska. He and the rest of them are now two hours behind me.

A few days ago I was sitting in front of my computer figuring out my whole music situation. My phone was sitting on the desk in front of me, underneath my TV and right in front of my keyboard.

My phone makes the ‘woopsie’ noise. You ever play Mortal Kombat? The one on Super Nintendo? You know that dude that pops up on certain occasions and says, “Woopsie?”

That is the notification sound on my phone.

I get a text message from him that says, “Nebraska is playing Wisconsin.” To which I replied by saying, “Yea.”

I then go onto say, “Based on what I hear a lot of people say that Nebraska is doomed because of their new coach.” He comes back with a, “Don’t listen to them, find out for yourself.”

I was quick to respond with, “I don’t got TV dawg.” To which he said, “Ah, there is always the internet, or you know, you could just go there.”

I had a displeased look on my face as I’m typing in my phone, “Downtown Lincoln”. “On game day.” “Fuck that noise.”

I could then hear what he was thinking, and before he had a chance to say it I turned it around on him.

The State of Nebraska is pretty small in population compared to its size. I’m not going to like actually look up these numbers, so feel free to correct me. Please correct me, I need a comment on my post.

Lincoln and Omaha are the two largest cities in this state, I think Omaha has close to 402,000 people while Lincoln has close to 250,000. The entire state of Nebraska is somewhere around 1.8 million. Without looking it up or doing any math I think that goes to say that about 35 to 40% of the states population lives in those two cities.

And on game day Memorial Stadium at the University of Nebraska becomes the third most populated area in the state. I remember hearing that it was a population of 92,000.

One of the most common things I get from my friends is the classic line of, “No one lives there.”

Coming from Western Washington where the cities are jam-packed next to one another and the entire states population is somewhere around nine million. I can understand how they would think that, and to be honest it is true.

Tacoma is next to Lakewood which is next to University Place, on the other side of Tacoma you run into Parkland which continues right into Spanaway. You could also go the other way and run into Puyallup that connets into Sumner, and that takes you into Auburn. From Auburn you can find a whole new string of cities that lead right into Seattle. Beyond that there is a whold new string of cities that lead into Everett.

So while Tacoma might technically be smaller than Lincoln, in size and population, you go outside of Lincoln and you are in the middle of nowhere. While in Tacoma you go from a city with 206,000 people that is running into another city of 38,000 people that runs into another city of 150,000 people, and you can keep doing this until you get to a city that is three times the size of Lincoln.

And most of the people that are in Seattle don’t even live there, they just work there.

So I was thinking, “Man, I used to work in Seattle, and it would take me three and a half hours to drive 56 miles south. And I’m complaining about how busy Lincoln is?”

Every now and again I would go to Seattle Hempfest, which is beyond busy. You’re talking about the entire population of Lincoln shoved into a park. And Seahawks games, how does that compare to the Huskers?

But in no way do I take that stereotype to the extreme and say “Oh what, you live in a town with two people.”

I said what he was thinking, because frankly I was thinking it too.

“Man, I’m not doing that, five people is entirelly too much for me, I don’t need that type of headache”


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