The Most Important Thing

Part II

There are too many people in this world that judge a book by its cover. If people took time to read that book they might just realize they stumbled onto something fantastic.

I’m in the 33% of the population that has started their relationship online. The girl who I started my relationship with is by far one of the best things that has ever happened to me.

After everything that happened I can’t believe that I found her.

This is a story of how it happened. I have a very forgetful memory and I’m sure that there might be some information that is either missing or out-of-order. It has been 3 years after all.

I’m sure if you ask her to tell the same story it will be a very similar but different account of events. She’ll probably even say, “I can’t believe you forgot that”.

While I was going to night school and working a full-time job at the same time I lived a very depressing life, I have been single for 5 years, I did not feel loved anymore.

I knew people loved me, but not intimately.

I joined a free dating site and didn’t have any luck with it for about 3 years. I was so sad about my situation in life that the mass majority of girls, being all of them, didn’t talk to me because I came off as a creep.

That was not my intention, I was not trying to seem like I was going to stalk you or whatever. However they didn’t know any differently, I was a stranger, and because of that I don’t blame them.

One night I downloaded the application on my smart phone and while laying in bed I stated talking to this girl who lived within 12 miles of me.

She talked back to me! I wasn’t expecting her to, but she did, that made me happy.

However that only lasted about an hour or so. A lot of time went by after that, I tried talking to her every now and then, but she never talked back.

Being as depressed as I was it really hurt. At the same time I knew if I kept talking to myself expecting a response and never getting one I was just going to depress myself more than I already was.

I gave up trying to talk to her. Back to trying to talk to other girls, very few that didn’t do more then say, “hi” or “don’t talk to me.”

It was towards the end of 2010 and I just let time pass like it was known to do.

I didn’t even care to talk to her anymore, she wasn’t going to talk to me anyways.

One night I was sitting in my bedroom staring at the glow of the computer monitor and thinking about life while I was crying. The light from the monitor was shining on the top of my head because as I laid my head down to feel the water works coming from my face.

Next thing I heard was the sound that Mario makes when he jumps on a turtle in Super Mario World. Oh shit, look at that, it’s Shannon.

After noticing that Shannon sent me a text message I heard fireworks outside.

It was 2011 and the ball just dropped, I assumed it was 12:01, I was not expecting to hear from Shannon. It was weird, but made me smile nonetheless.

“Happy New Year’s,” is what I saw when I looked after swiping my thumb to the right. I can’t remember if I replied by saying, “thank you” or “hi.”

We spent awhile texting back and forth that night, and she actually continued talking to me afterwards!

She must have thought I was nice or some shit, because it resulted in a date that lasted for two days. Later that night she confirmed that I made her happier than all the other guys that have talked to her.

That was good, I wasn’t really trying, but I’m glad I made, and continue to make, her happy.

Coming from a guys point of view…….. I tapped that ass son!

But I wasn’t planning to ditch her afterwards. I was not looking for a one night, in this case, a two night stand. I was looking for a girlfriend.

She just happened to be really fucking cool, even though I spent a few days testing out the waters I asked her to become my girlfriend nine days later.

We rarely fight, that is really important to me. One of the most important things to me is that she talks to me when she can tell that I’m either mad or sad.

That is really important to me because she knows how to get me to talk when I don’t want to.

She is a cool ass chick. To top it off most, if not all, of our viewpoints are the same.

She makes really good food to. I love food man.

I’d rather go to the store and buy everything I needed for her to make whatever I desire versus just saying, “fuck it, let’s get fast food.”

Because of a financial reasons she had to move back home, this was about five months after we started dating by the way.

She was going to a university that was in Tacoma but lived, 150 miles south, in Portland, Oregon.

We dated long distance for about a year or so. Every few weekends here and there Shannon would drive up to visit me. Every now and then I would drive down to see her.

I’m not that social of a person, and her dad was intimidating, so for a long time her family thought I was super weird.

She visited me more often because I felt weird around new people, that were more social than me.

As I was saying before, we rarely fight, and when we do she never yells at me. That’s mainly because, I assume, her dad raised her in such a way not to yell at people, and in the event of an argument she either lets it go or approaches the other person with understanding and compromise.

While living long distance I have not said, “I love you” yet.

To go back in time for a bit, I said it before, but to my kids mom. We never really loved one another in the first place, we just assumed it  was the right thing to do.

For that reason it took me a long time to say it because I was afraid that she would break my heart or it would have had a negative effect on our relationship.

One weekend she came to visit me and we got a hotel so we did not have to sleep at my parents house.

Apparently I was driving like shit that night, I remember telling her that I loved her, but I don’t remember all the little details that happened beforehand.

She reminded me of this a few days ago, I honestly didn’t remember most of the night. I’m guessing it’s either because I’m very forgetful and can’t remember much or I was thinking of whether or not I wanted to confess that I loved her.

That same night I came to find out that she stopped talking to me before the New Year because I came off as a creep. I don’t really blame her, I did. I’m just glad she gave me a second chance and came to find out that I was a really sweet guy that just happened to be really lonely.

During our long distance relationship, I “quit” my job which gave me another reason to take more trips down to Oregon.

I think our relationship gained strength with all of that extra time that we had to spend with one another. I opened up to her dad while this was going on.

He, along with the rest of her family, didn’t think I was as weird anymore.

At that same time my dad was taking a bunch of business trips, and one of these was unknown to me until some time later. I knew he went on a trip, but where he said he went was not where he went.

He traveled back to Nebraska and ended up being offered a job, ironically from the same person who offered him a job in Washington while we lived in Nebraska.

He eventually told me that he quit his job, but had a new job back home. He offered me a job. I really did not want to move back to Nebraska, but I was offered a job doing something I went to school for, twice, and haven’t been able to find.

Finding a job is hard as is. Then when you take into account that I’m physically disabled and then add western Washington, that had a 9% unemployment rate at the time, finding a job became a lot more difficult.

And my dad offered me a job.

Part of me didn’t want to leave Washington, not only were all of my friends there but Shannon was within driving distance as well. The other part of me wanted to move to Nebraska because I had a job that was going to pay a good amount of money.

After a phone conversation and a sad weekend in Oregon she agreed that if we lived together while it took her time to finish getting a degree then she would move out to Nebraska with me.

And that was cool, I didn’t expect her to move 1,600 miles just to find out that I was impossible to live with.

We managed to find an apartment in Tacoma and lived there for about a year. Then my dad flew to Washington to help us pack up the apartment and drive 1,600 miles southeast into the middle of the country.

We got into Nebraska on June of 2013 and we have been here for about three-quarters of a year now.

The sucky part is that the job I was offered was no longer available. It’s still there, but they don’t have the money to pay me.

I brought a girl from the Pacific Northwest into the middle of the country. I just moved home, but I no longer consider my home to be my home. Everyday I miss the general 253 area code location of that state.

The ultimate goal of moving here was to get about two years of work experience in the engineering field, so that when we did move back up to the Pacific Northwest it would be easier for me to find a job.

But know that goal has been altered because of the job that is not there. I’m currently working with Vocational Rehabilitation of Nebraska to help me find a job and she is holding down a part-time job while finding contacts to help her further her career in special education.

Telling her, “I love you,” worked out in the long run. We just celebrated out third year anniversary about two months ago.

I’m working on saving up money for a ring. We talked about it before she even thought about moving to Nebraska. It won’t be that much of a surprise, she knows I’m going to ask, but she doesn’t know when.

In the long run, I love this girl. I can’t believe I found her, she is too good to me.

On a very positive note, I don’t see her throwing anything at me because she is angry, and would be very happy to spend the rest of my life with her.


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